During college I had the privilege to travel around the country and get paid to work. Part of the architecture program was to do four quarters of co-op with a firm. I was able to work in Philadelphia and San Francisco, along with staying in the state and spending a quarter in Toledo with another working in Cincinnati. Less than a year after graduating I moved to Boulder after visiting a friend who lives in Denver. These moves were major steps in my life. Each time I learned something about myself and the profession I chose when I was a fifth grader. I experience life from coast to coast with stops in between. Saw some VERY beautiful parts of the country.
After coming back from Boulder, I ended up back in Cincinnati, a city I said I would never live in again after graduating college. The city has come a long way since I started college in 2005. They have cleaned up and revitalized neighborhoods that were left to rot for half a century. Businesses, the city and private citizens have invested millions of dollars to build new parks, restore old buildings and bring life back to downtown. Now, I live about 25 miles from downtown but I manage to make my way down there occasionally.
But I still feel like something is missing. I feel like I need to get away! There isn’t a real reason for it. Just something I have the urge to do. I know I can’t just up and leave, I have too many responsibilities now.
I have a good job that I enjoy going to (most days).
I have my house and land. With all its headaches, there are good moments like biting into the first tomato of the season or seeing the baby bunnies every morning.
My family and friends are close by and I get to see them more often than if I were out west.
But west is where I want to go! Or north. Or to the northeast. Or even the northwest. There are places I have not experienced that I want to visit. Oregon, Maine, Montana are high up on my list.
Every time I feel tied down by something I begin to push back against it. It is the same in relationships, as it is in jobs, as it is owning this place. There always seems to be something missing, even when everything is going well.
I feel like this is a lot of insight into my soul. More than I open up to most people. Even my best friends and parents, I don’t really talk about personal issues to, but here I am putting it out here for strangers on the internet to read. I’m okay with that. Part of the reason I started blogging was to have an outlet, a place to put my thoughts, share little victories and even the heartaches. I’m an introvert so writing allows me to say things I normally wouldn’t.
Thank you for allowing me to write and as always thank you for reading. For now I am going to go… Go to bed. It is already 1am and I have a list of things to get down around here since the weather looks good for today. Maybe I will dream of sitting on the coast or climbing a mountain. That will have to do for now…